Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Closets and Such

So, as part of their violence against women prevention/awareness week my college showed The Price of Pleasure a couple weeks ago.  The presentation was put on by the Women's Studies Advisory Committee, which is essentially code for my advisor who runs the Women's Studies program (I am a math major now, but I used to be a women's studies major and I did not change advisors).  There was a brief discussion (about 45 minutes to an hour) following the film.  I went into it expecting to be at least slightly annoyed, but I wasn't quite prepared for how angry and uncomfortable I became.

The thing is, most of my current social circle is fairly kink-friendly; I generally don't have to deal with any sort of real anti-kink attitudes in real life (online is a different story).  As a result I just wasn't prepared for people's reactions to the content of the film, particularly the more explicitly BDSM imagery.  The film in no way addresses the differences between consensually negotiated BDSM and actual violence/degradation, in fact it tends to conflate the two.  Essentially, in addition to being fairly explicitly anti-porn the film has a strong unstated anti-kink message as well.  

So I just sat there watching these people, some of whom I know fairly well and otherwise like, recoil in horror, shaking their heads in disgust as I silently fumed in the corner.  Fundamentally, it wasn't actually the disgust or the horror that really bothered me, I can at least somewhat understand that, it was the obvious sense of moral superiority that accompanied it; the room was filled with an overwhelming sense of distain.  My few attempts at addressing this were either ignored or treated with thinly veiled contempt.

I don't really know what to say about the experience.  It was extremely unpleasant, of course, but that wasn't really the worst part.  I left that discussion feeling ashamed, slightly dirty.  Some part of me really wishes that I had been brave enough to say what I was really thinking.  I wanted to stand up and point out that as wonderful as all their theory was this was my real life they were talking about.  I wanted to scream.  I wanted to tell them that it wasn't porn, it was ideas like theirs that had seeped into my unconscious to warp and poison my sexuality.  I wanted to tell them how hard I had to fight to find myself again.  Most of all I wanted to point out exactly how dangerous their words could be.

But I didn't.  I didn't say much of anything once it became obvious that they wouldn't listen.  I chose self-preservation over truth, and while I know that choice was the right one, I still couldn't help feeling slightly bad about it.

11 comments:

  1. I don't know if it will help you, but stripper/porn actress Renegade Evolution has a lot of posts about that thing, and occasionally attends showings of it to provide a voice against the propaganda.

    (I've never seen it, myself; I was never so much in with the women's studies set even when I was at Wellesley and my reaction to the anti-porn crowd is mostly, "... don't you have anything useful to do?" Even if it had existed when I was of an age to see things in college auditoriums without going to lots of bonus extra effort.)

    I don't blame you for not standing up. There's ... sometimes it's just too much to bleed right now.

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  2. It was pretty horrible. They actually alternated kink.com clips with drawings of torture during Pinochet's regime. That was the grand finale of the film. No explanation about BDSM or kink, just "porn is violent and degrading, see these women getting tied up and hit, see it's bad and gross."

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  3. That movie is against porn though. All porn. Not against what people do in their bedrooms. To only focus on "mainstream"porn would have weakened what they were doing.

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  4. That movie is lying, deceitful propaganda that additionally happens to break the law that anti-porn activists installed to ensure that porn was only made with proper consents. As is extremely common for anti-porn activists, because apparently women's consent doesn't matter if The Crusade calls for it to be ignored.

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  5. And, yes, equating kink to Pinochet is against what people do in their bedrooms. Trying to claim otherwise is naive at best.

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  6. Becstar-

    I'm not entirely sure how to go about talking to you on this topic. I read your most recent discussion over at SM-Feminists and let me just say that I will NOT tolerate that sort of thing here. Please be respectful of what others say and don't quote stats at me without properly citing them.

    Have you seen the movie? Because I have and the clear impression that it left is that the things that kinky people do are horrible and disgusting, not because they are on film or because they are done unsafely but just because they are done at all.

    Please don't insult my intelligence by implying that I'm missing the point of the film. Failing to address the nature of BDSM relationships while displaying BDSM porn as the utmost example of violent and degrading sexual imagery undermines any argument the film might have made about the negative impacts of pornography.

    Personally, I felt offended by the content of the film and marginalized by the discussion that followed. The film was produced by the Media Education Foundation, a group dedicated to examining the ways that media affects thought and society. They were fully aware of the effect that comparing kinky porn to actual torture would have on the average viewer. This film is base propaganda - an appeal to emotion, not rationality.

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  7. "That movie is against porn though. All porn. Not against what people do in their bedrooms."

    -headdesk-

    yeah, I haven't the energy, especially since I already apparently drove becstar to Leave Forever at SMF, so I'm just gonna do a Queen Emily and say:

    koala koala koala koala

    why bother with an actual argument with someone who's not gonna hear it anyway?

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  8. Becstar:

    No. You can't compare something to Pinochet, never mention that people's personal lives are something different, and ask questions like "what does it mean to eroticize torture-like actions" and expect people to get that it's the fact that a camera is running that we're supposed to be objecting to. I've been very patient with you over at sm-f, but no. Just no. That's bullshit.

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  9. "The film was produced by the Media Education Foundation, a group dedicated to examining the ways that media affects thought and society. They were fully aware of the effect that comparing kinky porn to actual torture would have on the average viewer. This film is base propaganda - an appeal to emotion, not rationality."

    Exactly. Funny how people who posit themselves as Watchdogs Over The Media seem to always churn out biased, poor-quality, propagandistic nonsense when they're making things themselves, isn't it?

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  10. Hello Hope,

    Never been here before, arrived by way of SM-F, and like your blog a lot. Your wallpaper is my favorite color!

    I have had just a bit of direct experience with the making - and unmaking - of The Price of Pleasure. Had a few things to say about it you might find interesting over here:

    http://bppa.blogspot.com/

    i invite you to drop on by and give it a read. Please rest assured that others have challenged this movie and its creators online and in person and will continue to do so.

    Thanks

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  11. Thanks for stopping by, Ernest. I think I remember seeing you in the movie.

    It's just so... slimy.

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